The Feeling After Traveling
I was 3 years away from home.
Since I was in University I always dreamt to go in exchange and see new countries.
Until the project in my job finished I had the opportunity to fly away home.
So recently I came back, and to be honest it was very hard for me.
I thought that to be back home will fill that little space that was needed to fill to reach happiness in my life, but surprisedly didn’t happened.
I was like ¨okay, I met different people, I could saw different places, etc, now I am ready to be back.
Of course when I arrived home everything seemed perfect, we were all happy and excited to see each other: my family, my dog, friends, eat the delicious food from my country ( Mexico).
It was perfect going back to my room and enjoy privacy after been in hostels sharing with estrangers.
You got me, is amazing to be back home.
What´s next?……..
But after all the meetings with everyone…. What’s next?
Personally, I wasn’t sure about my destiny, you know I didn’t have anything planned about stay or leave. I am sure that complicates more everything. It made me feel I had no direction.
Everything felt so strange and extraneous.
Getting over your arrival, your friends and family go back to their routine.
And there you are, all muppet and lonely, without much to do or maybe you have lots to do : detoxing you room from all that things that you no longer like anymore because: yeap, you are a different person now.
You start to sign in to the GYM , and things like that until find your new place.
Can you imagine me? Going back to live with my parent´s house? ( don’t judge me, in Mexico is very common to keep living with your parents even if you are a grown up.
My friends had very different style of life, they were all settle with not much time to hang out.
My little brothers were not little anymore, they do not obey me anymore haha .
Your friends used to like the same things as you and been interested in same things too. But now it feels like you were in other orbit. Your plans and their plans now seem so far away. And yeah you feel misunderstood. HEEELP!
Even my dog looks super older, the structure of the city changed, news stores, new buildings blah blah.
WAIT! I didn’t left living things like this. Of course time didn’t stop , their life change, like yours did.
Been traveling as a backpacker your life is not real really. I mean you have a job, you cook, you have friends. But it was momentary life.
So you return to your past life and you realize that is you the one don’t match.
And there you go with this kind of questions :
It was time to go back?
Do I truly want to live here?
This is my happiness?
And you know before started traveling, your friends, city, food, etc. was all you knew, and after traveling is like your mind expands. Maybe too much.
Now there is to much to think, to process, to compare. They said that is not good to compare, but it is not about who is best, is about to realize weaknesses and strengths.
My dog Mora
¨Been away helped me appreciate what I always had …..¨
Been away let me appreciate what I always had in my country but I never, like, payed attention how lucky I was to have it.
You know: food, weather, opportunities, people etc.
You know in everything there are good and bad things right?
After all that storm of thoughts passed, ( not fully) I realized about something that is vital and very important no matter where you are:
L I V E T H E PRESENT
ENJOY: each day, that dinner with your family, to hang out with friends, that walk in your favorite park, enjoy small things. Because you free soul, will never know where you will be tomorrow.
And you could regret for not having enjoyed this moment that life is giving you.
I proposed that to my self: enjoy that I have now the blessing of been home safe.
And if you don’t feel happy in some place, move on!….¨
And if you don’t feel happy in some place, move on!
We change every day , every second, with every situation, and is perfectly all right. Maybe today you love one place, tomorrow not, today you love one job, tomorrow not, we are changing beings. And the important thing is to do what sparks you joy.
Tell me, how was for you to be back home?
What did you do to readapt your self?
I´ll be waiting for your comments bellow.
With much love
Nataly Vargas
